Maybe it’s the Lexapro talking, but I feel like the days of toil and struggle and misery are behind me. Well, behind “us”.
Kevin got a job offer, and while he isn’t doubling his salary or anything crazy, it’s a nice raise. Even better—it’s giving us hope that our future isn’t always going to be paycheck to paycheck. Hope. Real hope.
I can’t even tell you what a difference that makes.
Last night, it finally dawned on me that we’re established. We own a house that I love every inch of. (It needs work, but that’s part of the love.) We’re making it a home with every kid-stain on the carpet and new picture frame making yet another nail hole in the plaster—it’s ours. It’s home.
We have our two girls, and we know that’s all we’re going to have. Our family is complete! No more surprises. No more vague plans for another girl or a boy or maybe just an only child… It’s Elizabeth and Elodie from now until I die, and that’s comforting to me. I can picture pastel bedrooms and Barbie dolls and Bonnie Bell lip gloss and PMS and mini-skirt battles…and I wouldn’t change a thing. I love our girls. I’m so content with our girls.
We have our group of friends and our church and we’re settled in our community. It took five years to reach this point, but we’re finally here, and it feels so good to belong. We have roots in our area.
Even this new job offer…maybe this is it? Maybe this is where Kevin will stay for the next 15 years? Maybe this is where he’ll build a nice pension and family vacations and his job will just be there. Solid. Secure. Dependable.
And even though I’m not where I want to be career wise…or artistically…or personally…or however you want to phrase that…it’s not weighing so heavily on me anymore. I don’t have a degree? Eh. I’ll get there. I’m only a receptionist? Oh, who cares! It’s a job. My writing is just a blog? Well...it’s a process. I’ll get there eventually. I’m 30 pounds overweight? *shrug* I’m the only one obsessing over it.
Our 7th anniversary is coming up, and rather than feeling the 7 Year Itch, I’m feeling the 7 Year Relax. This year, I think I’ll make my Joy of Cooking French Onion Soup (ah, to die for) and sit on the patio with two glasses of wine, the old comforter, a couple candles and look back on how far we’ve come. How much we’ve accomplished.
And where we’ll go from here.
16 comments:
this makes my heart happy.
Love it! Way to be positive!
www.shutterbugmama2010.blogspot.com
We're coming up on 7 years married, and have one child but no where near as settled/complete as you are/feel.
I'm jealous! Good for you!
CBG
canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com
Good for you... it takes a lot of work to stand back and really see the positives...
Congratulations!
Life is good. :)
It's nice to look on the bright side, but one thing to keep in mind is that marriage is work... every day of every year. Don't take it for granted. I did, and after 20 years, when I thought we'd "made it" my spouse left me. That was 10 years ago, and I've found there is life after divorce, but I certainly wish I'd have worked harder on my marriage. Hopefully you will not lose yours !
Where is the "Like" button around here lol
Awe, I love this post!!! It's so good to hear people relishing the good things in their lives!
This was the best post I have read in a long long time (not just in your blog)... Thank you. Very well said!!!!
Awesome!
Just found your blog but I must say I feel like I've known you forever - you have a great, honest writing style that I love!
I'm not anywhere I want to be career-wise either. I also spend way too much blogging for absolutely zero reason. And I am also the only one obsessing about it!
Great post.
So great. And, I can relate. I have two girls, lived in a community five years and celebrated our seventh anniversary. I think we're just beginning to feel comfortable in our skin, too. Nice.
Nice!
I'm so incredibly happy for you Jaci. This is wonderful.
i've read this like 3 times...and it's made me smile each time. love it :)
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