Reading about someone's struggles with Writer's Block is about as interesting as hearing a coworker's blow-by-blow recap of last night's dream.
Kill me now.
But alas! I have the Block.
I stepped away from my blog because after three years, I'm not only covering topics two million other mommybloggers are smothering to death--I'm bored with it.
I'd kill to write something more meaningful, but I'm also at a season of life where I can't even write blog posts.
My children are both in demanding stages. I can barely keep on top of the housework and meal prep. What little free time I have is divided between working out (mentally, I need it) and maintaining a non-roommate status with my husband.
Moments of easing back in an armchair with a new journal and the perfect writing pen aren't happening. Even staring at my laptop during nap time isn't an option. The work here is nonstop.
These girls need me. If I'm not on the ball, they are fighting and screaming and tearing the house apart within seconds. It's overwhelming and at times, really discouraging. Mothering THIS stage has pushed me to the brink.
Writing is a huge part of me that's being silenced by...life. I'm so ragged that my mind is fried and I can't come up with anything creative. Words slip through my fingers. I don't have it in me now, and that scares me. What if I never get it back?
That's the fear of every Mom, isn't it? We all give up something to have our children; some speck of selfishness has to go up on the highest shelf with the sharp scissors and the bottles of alcohol because the kids come first. Occasionally, we glance up at that shelf and long for our old adult things and hope that we don't forget them when the kids stop grabbing at our pants...in ten more years.
It saddens me, but I'm almost resigned to it. Writing isn't in the cards right now. Blog posts will be sporadic at best, and I'm glad I have this place to write SOMETHING. Otherwise, I would be totally lost in Momdom.
7 comments:
It happens to all of us. I will watch my feed reader for those sporadic updates.
It's hard to imagine now but eventually you WILL have that time to write (and yes, you won't forget it - the urge will always be there - it's up to you to act on it). Because one day those little ones won't need as much of your time; I promise, and that time will be here sooner than you think. (says the one who pretty much feels useless and un-needed these days)
Life happens. Enjoy what you have for now...and remember it...it will make great posts later.
Hmm...I have a feeling you're tempting fate and some odd, weird-ass, hilarious event, possibly involving circus clowns and a wombat, will occur. Until then, we'll wait patiently. :)
I will patiently wait for new entries...because you're worth sticking around for :-) Sporadic is better than never!
It happens to everyone & you'll be back to normal in no time. Have fun with your girls :)
The little ones are more important and harder to reconcile the "stuff I should've done with the kids" opposed to not interacting with cyber people.
Trust me this comes from the experience of being a selfish so and so and sitting here wishing I had taken the time to this and that with those wonderful kids back in the day.
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